Subscriber-only post

This post I originally sent the segment below via email only to those who subscribe to the email notifications, but then thought I should post regardless because I realize there are probably plenty of people who read the blog but aren't subscribed. I wouldn't want to deprive portions of my fan club, rogue though you may be. 😜

If I could give my left arm a Yelp review

There's no official blog post to accompany this email because, quite frankly, that just feels like too much effort. And given that I just had brain surgery a week ago, I think I'm allowed to shamelessly and unapologetically play that card. Although, if you have visited the blog, my bro did post updates, we just didn't send out corresponding notifications. I'm not going to relieve you of your duties just yet, though, bro, as I've got a lot of thoughts and a left arm that still hasn't gotten its $*&+ together just yet. (I'm typing all of this one-handed, while dictating some into a note in my phone and copying and pasting).

As noted on the blog, I made it through surgery and the doctors were very pleased with the outcome. The surgeon was able to remove more of the tumor than anticipated, as we thought it may be would not have very clearly defined edges, but apparently it did, which allowed him to much more easily remove the bad stuff. Immediately after surgery, while in recovery, I had a seizure. And then when I moved up to the ICU, I had another seizure. So the doctors doubled my dosage of anti-seizure medication, which I will remain on. I couldn’t even so much as wiggle my toes on my left foot when I came out of surgery or do much of anything with my left arm. I seemingly made rapid progress after that and quickly regained some motor control both of my left arm and left leg, but then had a bit of a setback over the weekend when I had a series of seizure-like episodes that stripped me of that progress. It was incredibly discouraging. I felt like I was being reminded constantly of everything I was losing. Occupational therapy came in for an evaluation, and there was the reminder yet again of what I couldn’t do. The physical therapist came in and there was the reminder yet again of what I couldn’t do. The speech therapist came in and there was a reminder yet again of what I couldn’t do. I just felt wave after wave of grief, confronted by loss every time I turned around.

I felt that grief yet again when we went to buzz my hair. Contrary to what we thought would happen, the surgeon did not shave all my hair. With my Dad as acting barber, we also buzzed the remainder of my hair over the weekend. Just call me Sinead.

I made progress again movement-wise and had no more seizures, so I was officially discharged Monday afternoon (good riddance IVs, beeping monitors, too-loose gowns, and wretchedly uncomfortable beds).

And thanks, mom, for proofing this before sending. It's one thing to look like an idiot via private texts. I'd rather not look like an idiot in a group email to the masses, brain tumor to blame or not.)

At one point, there was talk of me needing to go to intensive inpatient rehab, but I was able to improve enough, that I will do outpatient, PT, OT, and speech at a facility here in Columbus. So, there’s still a long road ahead of rehab. I keep thinking of the verses related to the right hand of God. Those verses became prayers often while I was in the hospital, that the mighty, strong and sovereign supernatural right hand of God would uphold the very weak left hand of my very human body.

“Now this I know: The Lord gives victory to his anointed. He answers him from his heavenly sanctuary with the victorious power of his right hand.” Psalm 20:6

PS: To anyone that I texted this past week, I apologize if my texts were complete gibberish. My comprehension early on really was not great and I was slightly horrified when I went back and reread text messages and realized what nonsense I was sending people. I told my aunt, it’s like I was drunk texting, only without alcohol.

I can’t thank everyone enough for their fervent prayers of intercession on my behalf. Don’t stop.
And for the record, the left arm would definitely get a one star yelp review. ️