On paper, it made so much sense. He was a pilot, good-looking, funny, kind, well-liked by his peers, adored by other girls, loved Jesus, was one of my closest friends and best of all? He cared about me, was interested in me, and wanted to date me, wanted to see if this thing between us would turn into marriage some day in the future. What woman in her right mind wouldn't date a guy like that? It was a seemingly obvious and open door of opportunity.
The world told me to take it.
Only I didn't.
I had long conversations with Jesus over that boy. Why not, God? Why can't I say yes to him? He loves you, and in some form or fashion, he loves me. What could be so bad about saying yes to him and seeing where this thing goes?
There was no lightning bolt from the blue, no detailed reasoning from Jesus etched in the form of stone tablets, but there was always a check in my gut from the Holy Spirit. The answer simply was no. And not only was it a no, but there was a strong sense I would be disobedient if I forged ahead. I knew without a doubt I had opportunity to date this tender-hearted warrior who loved Jesus, but I did not have permission.
In the life of a Christ-follower, discernment through the power of the Holy Spirit will be what shapes our ability to distinguish between opportunity and permission. We cannot operate like the world operates because let's be honest, the world is exceptionally gifted at getting opportunity and permission mixed up. The world thinks because you are presented with a chance to move ahead in a certain way with your plans, that it's meant to be. It's fate! It's destiny! It's your chance to speak your truth! You had been wanting to get out of your job, and then a company offers you a chance to interview out of the blue! Surely this must be a sign! Seize the opportunity! Or as in my case, you want to date and a man comes along who is textbook perfect. He's single, you're single. You both have a pulse. Surely this must be a sign! Seize the opportunity!
That is how the world operates. Open doors equate to green lights which equate to permission. Elisabeth Elliot calls this the 'danger of coincidence' in her book Passion and Purity, saying, "More sins are defended by the claim of coincidence ('it was meant to be') than this world dreams of - or at least than it admits (59)."
David knew the danger of defending his sins by the claim of coincidence. In 1 Samuel 24, he was on the run from Saul, the king over Israel, a man bent on ending David's life. But at that point, God had rejected Saul as king and David had been anointed by Samuel to serve as Saul's successor. Saul had zero interest in allowing this. David fled to the desert, hiding out in caves, constantly on the move to escape Saul's hand.
On one occasion, David and his men were tucked far back into a cave. Saul had been pursuing David, and unbeknownst to Saul, he entered the same cave where David was hiding. David's men turned to him,
"This is the day the Lord spoke of when he said to you, ‘I will give your enemy into your hands for you to deal with as you wish.'" Then David crept up unnoticed and cut off a corner of Saul’s robe.
Afterward, David was conscience-stricken for having cut off a corner of his robe. He said to his men, “The Lord forbid that I should do such a thing to my master, the Lord’s anointed, or lay my hand on him; for he is the anointed of the Lord.” With these words David sharply rebuked his men and did not allow them to attack Saul. And Saul left the cave and went his way (1 Samuel 24:4-7)."
David could have ended Saul's life in that cave. His men told him as much. His sin would have been defended by coincidence. Look! Now is your chance to kill the very man who is out to kill you! God has surely brought him to this cave for that reason! But David knew opportunity did not equal permission. He could not afford to get the two mixed up. Saul was the Lord's anointed. Just because Saul had come to the very cave David was hiding in did not mean it was a sign from God to take Saul's life.
We see the same when Jesus was crucified. He was unjustly beaten, flogged, stripped and nailed to a cross. Blood was pouring from his body. His lungs were screaming for oxygen. His shoulders were likely wrenched out of socket. It was an excruciating way to die. In Matthew 27, Matthew writes of the responses from those to either side and at the foot of the cross:
Two rebels were crucified with him, one on his right and one on his left. Those who passed by hurled insults at him, shaking their heads and saying, “You who are going to destroy the temple and build it in three days, save yourself! Come down from the cross, if you are the Son of God!”
In the same way the chief priests, the teachers of the law and the elders mocked him. “He saved others,” they said, “but he can’t save himself! He’s the king of Israel! Let him come down now from the cross, and we will believe in him. He trusts in God. Let God rescue him now if he wants him, for he said, ‘I am the Son of God.’” In the same way the rebels who were crucified with him also heaped insults on him (Matthew 27:38-44).
Jesus could have stepped down from the cross. The mocking crowd told him as much and he no doubt had the divine power to do so. He really was the Son of God and being the Son of God meant he had the power to do the very thing the people said. But Jesus knew opportunity did not equal permission. He knew the danger of coincidence, that just because the people told him he could (albeit mockingly so) did not mean it was a sign from God for him to do so.
So he stayed.
When he could have come off the cross, he stayed.
Jesus did not get opportunity and permission mixed up.
And because he did not get those two mixed up, you and I have both opportunity and permission to go from death to life (John 5:24).
Because he did not get those two mixed up, you and I have both opportunity and permission to spend all eternity dwelling with him (John 3:16).
Because he did not get those two mixed up, you and I have both opportunity and permission to sit at the wedding feast of the Lamb, eating and drinking until our heart's content (Revelation 19:9).
Because he did not get those two mixed up, you and I have both opportunity and permission to approach the throne of grace with confidence, assured that we will find mercy and receive grace in our time of need (Hebrews 4:16).
Because he did not get those two mixed up, you and I have both opportunity and permission to ask that out of God's glorious riches he would strengthen us with power through his Spirit in our inner being so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith (Ephesians 3:16-17).
This is one opportunity - the opportunity to love Jesus and follow him - you cannot afford to mix up.
Consider this your green light.
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