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1.21.2012

God's Funny Like That...

Let's just say yesterday was not the greatest of days.  I don't want to use the words "horrible" or "awful" because I feel like it's an insult to those who are legitimately having bad days, like my friends Jon and Alex.  Both have been in the hospital since Wednesday night, independent of one another.  Alex suffered another round of severe Crohn's pain and was staring down the possibility of another surgery.  And Jon - well, some very scary moments when I thought I was going to lose my precious friend.  He is wheelchair-bound due to Muscular Dystrophy and has been quite sick in general here lately, problems breathing and things.  But heart problems popped up on Wednesday, starting with an irregular heartbeat.  It went downhill from there, to the point on Thursday night where he was non-responsive.  And to go into the hospital yesterday to see him, to feel so helpless in the face of something that I could physically do nothing to fix, I wanted to run and hide.  And to look his mom in the eye as she pulled back from a hug, tears streaming down her face, barely whispering, "We almost lost him, Courtney..."  Sometimes the thought is too much.

So me not getting a job that I so desperately wanted, one that I knew I could have done well, seemed an afterthought in the midst of all that my friends were going through.  They were fighting for their next breaths, hoping those moments to be without pain, and here I was crying my eyes out about not getting a job.  Life wasn't making a whole lot of sense yesterday.

After making the rounds at the hospitals, I needed to run some errands to pick up some things on the "to buy" list.  As trivial and meaningless as it seems in the face of what has been happening, I was on a mission to find a pair of skinny jeans.  I don't own a pair and quite frankly, never have cared to own a pair, but for whatever reason, I decided to cave and buy a pair.  So I made a pit-stop at the mall.  I'm looking at jeans and as I'm becoming aware of what's playing over the stereo, I hear the lyrics, "...everything's right, hey, everything's right tonight..."

Of course, God would do something like that.  He plays Matt Wertz, one of my  all-time favorite musicians, in the middle of a crowded mall at the moment when I most needed to know that everything was, in fact, going to be right.

So, not only did I get a pair of skinny jeans (on sale!) out of the deal, I got a gentle reminder from a sovereign God via Matt Wertz:

Everything's right.

2 comments:

Emily Powell said...

Love this and love you!

ERICA said...

You left out the joy in the size of those jeans, too! ;)

Great perspective here, but for what it's worth, like I told you, I looked at Ryan when I read that you didn't get that job and said, "WHAT? No one is more qualified than Courtney. At ANYTHING lol. This is proof I should never feel bad about not getting something, because sometimes the wrong people just get things." Ha. :) But seriously.

LOVE YOU.